Today is the 6th anniversary of my Dad's passing. 6 years...Really?! It's been 6 years since I've heard my Dad's boisterous laugh, his electric smile, how his eyes danced when he was being onery, the way he used to "joke" until the "joke" just wasn't funny anymore, and of course his wonderful hugs! I miss my Dad. My heart hurts today for him.
I have been reading "Heaven is For Real"...and am so conflicted on my thoughts & feelings towards this day in particular. I have such hatred for April 4th it's hard to put it into words. I HATE that my Dad was taken from me at 28 years old...on April 4th, 2005! I feel so selfish with my thoughts of what he's missing in my life. He never got to meet my wonderful boys. He's not here to see what we have become. That if I live past 56 years old he wouldn't have even gotten to witness half of my life! It makes me so sad to think about. This book sheds a different light on things for me though. With all of the references to Heaven & how absolutely wonderful it is...how can I still feel like this?! This was the day my Dad became healthy & pain-free again! This was the day my Dad got to experience everything he lived his life for! My Dad is in H.E.A.V.E.N.! How can I be so bitter when I know he is in such a marvelous place?! This book has done wonders for me spiritually - I feel like in some ways it's enabling me to reconnect with the very foundation my parents tought me for as long as I can remember...and I think that makes my Dad happy! Maybe he helped to guide me to this book...I felt so drawn to read it (which doesn't happen often). (I recommend this book to anyone...religious/non-religious those who have loved ones already in Heaven or not.) It is such a blessing to catch a glimpse in the glorious place my Dad now resides.
As I close...there are 2 things I know for sure at this moment & they are...
1. My Dad must have extraordinary Angel wings!
2. I can't wait to see him again one day!
1 comment:
Wow, I think I may have to pick that book up. Spring through Summer and Fall 2005 brought a lot of saddness for our family too and it is still difficult to see a life without Adam's biological mom, his step-mom, his good friend, and his grandfather. They all passed between April and July 2005 and it was a very difficult time for us. I struggle still with all the prayers that went forth and the sadness at the passings. Then we moved so far away from everyone and everything we had ever known to make a new life. I am so glad you chose to blog even in your conflict. I will have to see if I can track down this book it may be just what I need to read at the moment.
Post a Comment